Well, just a brief update, and then there will be a gap between now and my next blog, maybe up to two weeks.
The reason for this is; I am traveling up to Sydney for a few days over Christmas time (Woo! Bring on the road trip!)
Then I shall be heading back to Victoria, to go to the wonderful music rock festival that shall be taking place over new years... (Did I mention that I'm going for free? Ryan and I happen to have gotten volunteer spots YAY!)
Then I will be back, writing blogs to my little hearts desires.
Now, today as I strolled down to our local post office, I decided to replace a gift that I wasn't a massive fan of, it was a poorly chosen bed spread on my mothers behalf.
So after I delivered your presents, and a couple of comments on the amount of gifts and destinations, I made my way up to the bedding store.
There wasn't a lot to pick from, but I'm very happy with my choice, an aqua and navy double sided little ditty, with a nice coastal print, timelessly classy.
The best part about this is, whenever anyone ask's me what I want as a gift, I can say, "European pillows please, with white cotton covers, thank you."
Yes, yes I will, and I shall give them a very polite and cheery grin.
My little corner of heaven.
This is me enjoying the feel of the new, starched fabric.
Well, I am currently babysitting a boy named Luca. I used to do scouts a few years back and Luca's mother was my Scout lead, and her older son was in my scout group.
So anyway, I just thought I would let you know what I'm doing as I am writing this blog.
I have been all over town over the past two days, hanging out with Ryan's best mate named Chris, who has come back from Tazzie for a few days to see his family for Christmas.
Today Chris took me to the most amazing little op-shop, I love finding the undiscovered little shops that no one knows about.
I found some gorgeous trinkets there.
I'm also writing up my 'thank you for coming to my birthday and buying me gifts' letters.
I did the artwork on the front, I think it's a little more sentimental.
Oh! I also have another new job (the doughnut place is closing down), I'm a waitress at a Tapas restaurant. The people there are absolutely amazing and it is located a few metres away from the beach, so you can look out down the pier.
Plus I get a free drink when I finish, I decided I would go with a nice sweet Moscato on my first shift.
I know I haven't been a very social blogger at the moment, I don't really have an excuse either.
I'm quite ill at the moment, I have an excruciatingly sore throat, so I can't talk to anyone because it hurts so much. I couldn't even call my boss to tell him I couldn't come in today, I had to get my boyfriend to call for me.
I feel like my head is in limbo at the moment, I'm not happy about anything in particular. I have had some doubt about my relationship with Ryan, but I'm not going to do anything rash, I still love him to death.
But I'm not feeling at 'home' anywhere at the moment, my home just feels like it's a temporary settlement for the time being, Ryan's house is cold and small, plus his mum is there and I can't stand her... she can never seem to be pleased with anything anyone does for her, and then she complains more when one little thing doesn't go her way.
I found out that I got an A+ for my year 12 art folio, boo-yah! Thats a great thing in my favor, means I don't have to worry about my results for that exam too much, because it only counts for 30% of the mark
All I have been doing over the past few weeks is reading, working and sleeping.
I have a confession, when I read, and if it is an exceptionally good book or series, I have a tendency of throwing myself heart and soul into the novel, and wishing I could just slide myself into the story and only exist with in those pages. This only really works with fantasy as you could probably assume.
I haven't actually admitted that little hidden desire with anyone before, everything seems easier to admit on this, knowing that everyone who reads my blog liver over in North-America.
Ok, that is all for now.
Sorry that there isn't any exciting pictures to show you, I look and feel horrible at the moment.
Thank you for showing a glimmer of interest to this post if you actually read it :)
Yes, I'll finally have enough money to get a car soon!
Yes, I now have two jobs.
My original job I get paid $10 an hour to run the whole shop on my own, this is at the average doughnut joint where I work with really awesome I get paid $15 and hour and was dishes. We also have a beautiful staff lunch, where we eat all the delicious foods they make for the customers and we get a glass of wine to wash it down.
I was tasting wine all day, getting to know the different personalities of each bottle.
It was wonderful!
Today I went to Ryans Aunty and Uncles house for a pre christmas lunch, because his cousin is going away for Christmas, so this was for him.
It was a great day, getting to know his family a little better. They go into detail so much, I felt a little uncomfortable. But that's how different families roll I guess.
Then on the way home (an hours drive) I had some practice driving, nearly wiping everyone out on the round-abouts a few times. I need to learn to change gear before entering them.
His turn to meet everyone at Christmas time in Sydney. We will be driving up. I love road trips!
- I now have six wonderful followers, and in our little blogging community we happily converse with one another.
Last night I went to my best friends house to help her recover from not having her boyfriend in the state.
Turns out she rudely talk on the phone to him all night (she talks to him 5 hours a day usually because he lives in Sydney. She couldn't even have one night to hang out with a mate), whilst I was banished to the couch and had to watch TV. When I could have been in my own boyfriends arms. Selfish bitch, I hopes she chokes on the phone cord.
Name Two things that absolutely terrify you, that you don't openly admit to people, due to the growing sense of embarrassment about the situation.
I want to see how far this gets, so do the same on your blog.
Just a little social experiment of mine =]
- Aliens! I am absolutely petrified of the idea of aliens. I can recall a few situations where at night, I would lie so still and barley breath due to the absolute fear of hearing noises out side, thinking they have come, and my house was one of the first hit by them. Even at sleep overs I would freak out (turnes out that they had a serious rat problem).
- When a family member is late home, or when Ryan drives home late at night from my house, I feel sick with fear about what might have happened to them. If they don't call or reply to a message, that makes me feel even more fearful, almost to the point of panicing, I get myself ready for the call to tell me of their death.
There you go. Now you think I'm an absolute nut case, it's your turn.
I love the Silversun Pickups. They always make me happy, same with The Grates.
But tonight these artists just don't seem to be making much of a difference. I wont even go near Vampire Weekend, they're too poppy for me at the moment.
I got chocolate in my ear at work today, it was really weird.
My best friends boy friend hase gone back to his home state, so we just hung out at work, throwing Mcdonalds chips at each other. (Does anyone else like the squishy chips, or is it just me?)
Jade has a tendency to cry frequently, so now it is a little like playing wolf, I just don't react to it so sympathetically anymore. She's been like that since year 7, interesting character none-the-less.
I really want a yellow tooth brush now.
I'm home again, but I'm not motivated to do anything. My fingers even feel a little weak from typing. Wow, if I put my mind to it, I can really complain a lot.
I got new underwear today... they are so cute, red and while stripes with lace and red ribbon around the top
I don't know why on earth I told you that, but I guess I'm just overly open. Plus there had to be one good thing that happened to me today. I didn't see Tom, I'm not at Ryans House. So this will have to be the next best thing.
I miss not being at Sam's, but I cannot disrespect my mother by self adopting another.
I ate a cheese burger today. I guess I'm no longer a vegetarian now.
Wahts up been drinking for a while and i think htis is how you blog by telling everyone exactaly hwat i thik fo this idea fo blogin. its sily, like yuo are standing in the midle of a shoping centre and yelling all yuor thougths out to everynoe.
Elyse: Thank you same for your input. You stupid twat.
Go and drink some more and get off my laptop.
Sorry everyone who had to try and understand what the drunk is going on about.
I had all these interesting thoughts that I wanted to jot down on my blog. I was thinking about it when I woke up, then having a shower, then eating breakfast.
All these interesting, yet not really fantastical thoughts, and ideas to keep you entertained with.
But then I had a brilliant day.
This morning, I studied... very little.
Then I went to lunch with a guy, social purposes only, nothing romantic!
He has a mohawk, has a labret, crazy beard. Funny, quirky, nice, encouraging, and has similar tastes to me. Like ART! HE LOVES ART... He's doing fine arts at university
So, I had a good day because, we had coffee and lunch, then we ambled around the shopping centre, talked over lunch for a few hours. Kept asking for bottles of chilled water (30 something degree celsius day) whilst we sat in the blistering heat, under a large umbrella. Poor Tom was wearing black, even thought that's what he usually wears, its just too hot.
So, after walking around for a few hours, talking about nothing, and watching him draw amazing cartoons, we ended up going to have a drink at the pub (I'm a hopelessly pathetic light weight drinker... after just one pot).
I want to catch up again soon.
I hope Ryan can meet him, he might get along with him.
If not, tom can be my new random T-shirt boy.
Because thats how I met him. I walked into his store whilst waiting to be picked up after work, asked him a few questions.
Then I had more questions a few weeks later, and then he decided that I was interesting, and that I should come back again after work just to chat.
Then we decided that we would get coffee.
It's a nice social break from pretending to study all the time.
I love where I'm currently situated. When I went through my major hippy phase I practically lived here.
So, now I'm home again.
But, that is all settled.
I saw my little sister today and nearly cried. I miss my family so much, I hate fighting with them.
I was thinking a little, and talking to my friend Kelly, we both agree that my mother is completely stressed. Not just over me and my finishing up of 13 years of schooling.
But of all the up and down fighting with dad. She has booked a holiday to Paris next year for a surprise 50th birthday present, but she's trying to hide it from him and it isn't helping... financially.
Well, that's all for this afternoon my friends.
Oh, Psychology exam went well today =]
Sitting in the sun in the sun room.
Charles(left) and Sam (right).
Sammy is the guy I'm chilling with for a few weeks.
The past two days have been an emotional blur for me.
Yesterday I started crying for no reason again. I think this might be due to the stress of exams. But it occurs all the time, so now I'm starting to think otherwise.
Anyway, yesterday, I started crying again whilst I was studying, and mum saw me. I thought, "Oh crap! She's seen me crying! I'll just say I needed a break, and it's starting to get to me again..."
But then she went off at me, started yelling, telling me 'others are a lot worse off, I shouldn't have any excuses to cry for no reason'.
Mum and Dad just really got on my case. I needed to get out. So I went for a walk, but I couldn't stop crying (I know I really sound pathetic at this point, but I'm just informing you of why I'm no longer at home), so I just sat outside till they left the house. Then I went to Ryans, and I was going to stay there the night. But as I was sleeping they called Ryans house, threatening to 'ground me until christmas', meaning they won't converse with me until then, and I'm not allowed to see my family in Sydney for Christmas (honestly, I thought they would come up with a better threat because I'm 18, but I guess it's the best they've got), this would happen if I didn't get home by 11pm.
So I went home, they didn't talk to me at all that night, then they tried to bully me into going to school again to study, but I told them I had other plans... public library.
But according to parentals, I was unter their thumb till the end of exams.
So I packed up my things and said good bye.
So now I'm living at my best friend Sam's house. His mum and I get along really well, she's always been my adopted mother (metaphorically speaking), and his place is my home.
So yeah, that's where I am now.
So, I'm not all with it still, but I'm much happier.
Ok, as I was typing my new follower a message (he likes poetry XD), I was sitting behind my little sisters acoustic guitar (I'm sadly attempting to teach myself how to play it, and I decided to learn 'Father and Son' by Cat Stevens).
But, as I was sitting behind it, I could see the reflection of me typing in it. So basically, it made me giggle.
Yeah, thats all I've really got.
Oh, yeah, I took a picture of it, just because I'm so amazing, and I can do that...
Ryan and I have been together for nearly eight wonderful months.
I love Ryan, I really do. We love the same music, we share the same thoughts, and no one I know (except for maybe my best friends Jade and Kelly) can predict what I'm about to do or say next.
We connect and love each other for it.
But over the past few months, I have lost the 'lust' is our love a little.
Ryan just became plain Ryan.
Say for instance looking at your Mum, and just seeing the same woman you have seen all your life. Yet when someone else looks at her, they see a beautifully matured woman that shares your characteristics.
Well, it's a little like that.
So, I came close to cheating on Ryan a little bit.
In clubs, or parties.
Probably not the nicest places to meet people. Usually shallow gatherings, where all you can really say to the other person is your name and age, and if your lucky, maybe a conversation.
I tell Ryan everything. He knows about all this.
But tonight, I could see him in every angle I used to see him in.
Then I realized why I fell in love with him in the first place. So basically, I fell right back in love with again.
Just thought I would get that off my chest before falling asleep next to him.
I don't know about you, but I can be pretty cautious about what I consume.
Well most of the time... ok somethings when I'm consciously thinking about it.
So basically, if I keeps feasting whilst studying I shall become a fat porn star.
This turn about has occurred due to my complete craving for chocolate, or just junk food in general (mmmm could really go for a bucket of KFC right now).
Today I bought 4 chocolate blocks, and doughnuts from where I work.
So this should last me for the next few days. This is what helps me study! As well as music and talking on the phone... you know, the usual.
It was my birthday a month or so ago, finally turned 18!
So my Aunty thought she would send me a photo of me when I was two or three and she was in her late teens... She sent it today, as well as a 'happy birthday' message. But this random act of just thinking to send it to me really made my day.
I found this really cool little fact book, and it has amused me for hours.
So I think I'll put in a fact every now and then just to keep things interesting.
"In Iraq you can eat snakes any day of the week except Sunday."
There you go, my first fact for you.
Ok, my pool is 30 degrees celsius, I don't know what that is in fahrenheit... like plus 35 or something.
But this is my end credit, saying... Hahahaha, it's going into Summer here!
If only you could see me at this current moment. its 5:10 pm, and I'm still in my pajamas.
Well, realistically it's just my Modest Mouse Top, but it's oversized so i wear it to bed.
But! The point is... I'm so bloody lazy. I have my first year 12 exam on Friday. So thats 3 days away! But the thing is. I just don't care anymore. In fact, I have been filling up my days off with stencils and spray paint, as well as talking to Ryan, and watching Wanted
I'm truly not as pathetic as I'm making out to be.
So I'm lacking motivation. Even though I need the study scores to get into a University so I can do my nursing and midwifery courses.
The past few days have been a blur. And I have been more drunk now than I have been all year. Sadly that doesn't take much for me. Just one pint really. Then I got dressed up as 'miss massage' so they wouldn't kick me out for being in my school uniform. I was going to wear that costume for my final day at school, but decided I'll leave it for Ryan in the bedroom.. I got dressed up as a leprechaun instead.
Work has been average, I only get $10 an hour, I'm thinking of quitting.
I'm also working illegally, so cash only, and I burn myself all the time.
(I really do need to get some pictures up, you would be able to understand me more visually that way)
I was playing with the idea of actually doing this for a few days...
So here I am.
Where do I start, I guess with the ramblings of my simple 18 year old self.
Ha! Anyway. I'm new to this, so bare with me here.
Ok, I'll explain a little bit about me. As you can see in my 'about me' section, I am young and potentially fruitful, not that you really need to know that, I just thought it sounded good. Such a biblical term, like 'with child' etc.
I live in Australia, I have nearly completed my 13 years of education, I'm not looking forward to the pressure and my boyfriend is treating me like my parents, giving me time limits on the phone so I can go study and such.
I guess I'll do a couple of blogs a week if I have time. This really is for me to vent, but if you happen to stumble over my complaints and excited outbursts feel free to comment.
The count down is 5 days of school left. And I cannot be bothered staying at school for the recommended hours, luckily people in my year level can now drive (I'm pathetic, I'm scared of driving for some reason, Ryan has to force me to drive his car), so I managed to get a lift home.
But the day is not through, so I might still have more to add later (if I can do that).
And if anyone happens to read this, I would greatly appreciate some help with putting photos and videos up. I'm a ladite, so this is a great feat for me.
Ok, thats all for now.
I think I'll go on tomorrow, just to distract me from actually studying.
I'm fairly open. I find it hard to make a decision. I like watching TV series on DVD. I consume large amounts of Green tea with Jasmine. I'm pretty lazy. I LOVE Chinese news papers, I'm in love with their cartoons (please feel free to send my way)...